Things sometimes feel complicated

I get scared by the media telling me that as a fat woman I will die. Although scared, it seems that maybe I am not scared enough!

I am scared of reports that say; people who lose a lot of weight put themselves at risk of early death. Apparently, losing weight can be bad for you, yes really! Then there are the significant numbers of people ill as a result of a crash diet! I know quite a few people who wish they’d never heard of The …… (you name it) diet.


Add to this the fucked up mix of nutritional advice  on offer from health professionals which goes something like this: low GI but don’t eat bread, pasta, rice; low fat but not low fat spread, or yogurt because of the added sugar; no cakes, biscuits, alcohol, chocolate or anything else with sugar, which is fair enough; protein is good for you but too much of it kills you. The result is that when I sit in a restaurant I look for the healthiest thing to eat, I check out the salads and find one that doesn’t have loads of nuts, oil, mayonnaise and order. You know the story!

I feel good for a moment, then the gremlin in my head wonders if the staff will wash the salad well enough. Whatever that means!

At times like that, I have been known to change my order to deep fried fish! The rationale? Bacteria would have to work hard to survive the fat frier!

complex food

I know its a bit fucked up but its just some of what goes on in my mind.

I hope that one day I will be happy with myself! And who knows, maybe that day is today!


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